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when I lock eyes and look into the soul of a silk moth what do I see? a bundle of multicellular life? the kaleidoscope reflection of the retina? nothing? the DVD screensaver logo bouncing around? the genuine peak of evolution of the Bombyx Mori?

i had silk moths once, you know? i have no idea what kind of genetic mutations I’ve been unknowingly instilling and engineering inside of my silk moths

remember that guy who said that all my silk moths were a bunch of genetic dead ends? that was only the first month I had the moths, I don’t think he’ll be saying the same thing if he ever finds out about this

the first winter I had them I left the window open on a cold night and all the moths froze to death

dead silk moths are really fat, especially considering how many of them I had, I filled half the trash bag with moth corpses before I was done

you think the moths are done with me? I thought so too but I was wrong, man I was wrong, this first winter was not the end, it was not even the beginning of the end, it was only the end of the beginning

when I threw the moth corpses out, the eggs must have been in hibernation, I think the eggs used the moth corpses themselves as insulation, a couple months later in the spring some of the silk worms made their way into my shed with the mulberry saplings and sure enough they grew up to become silk moths

a surprise, to be sure, I almost thought I was rid of them, this genetic line of silk moths had grown themselves so fat that their organs literally didn’t fit inside their body, they looked like Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s heart during his standard medical checkup at the Coolidge Naval Hospital on April 1945

needless to say, the moth’s continued presence in my life seemed to be a stroke of luck on their part, although I had to say that I did not exactly want them any more by that point

when the moths were struck by fungal infection, most likely due to the much more open and unsanitary environment of the shed they set themselves up in, I did nothing for them, if they wanted to survive this year, the moths would have to figure it out themselves

the moths that died to the fungus seemed to leak and excrete a vile black substance from their guts that they did not normally leak or excrete, although I was not really very troubled by this as my objective at the time was to rid myself of the silk moth presence, and just like last time, I sure thought I did

so early yesterday, in the middle of the day, this chilly day in the middle of the wet and maritime and chilly Oregon winter, and I went into the shed to get a shovel, the same shed that the silk moths made their home, and I went into the shed and saw a brown silk moth flapping its tiny wings against its obese little moth body, I was shooken by its presence, beyond discountenance, genuinely knocked for six by its continued existence in the castle that I hold lordship in

you wanna know what I did? I got a fan and put it in the shed, and I got a jug of bleach and a jug of ammonia, and I mixed the two jugs together and shut the door to the shed

so if tetrazeta or tiramisu or Mark or any of the other people read these pages of mine, now you know what happened to the silk moths, because I gassed them, ok? I gassed the moths, like I should have done the first time I wanted them gone

I mean, brown silk moths, really, silk moths aren’t brown, they haven’t had any kind of color pigmentation for thousands of years

even if this was some kind of genuine biological breakthrough that I literally shut the door to, I’m not interested in it, the moths are gone from my life, and this story is over now